My Thoughts On Marriage

     There is a natural, and God-given instinct for every individual to desire and crave love and acceptance.  For this reason, it is natural for us to seek out friendships and relationships.  All around the world, people are marrying every moment of everyday.  It is natural to want to marry; to want to have someone to talk to and to wake up to every day.  I believe this is why so many people marry; and why, when someone feels they should have a spouse and doesn’t, is frustrated and uneasy with life.

     I also believe that God has given each one of us dreams and passions.  Some say, “our calling.”  Everyone of us feels it.  This need and drive to do what we are passionate about.  There are so many people who, in their lifetime, do not follow their dreams and pursue their passions, and thus feel as though they missed out on life.  It is something WE HAVE to do.

     So what happens when 2 people come together, with a need to be loved and accepted, but also have 2 very very different dreams?  They get married, are happy for awhile….. until they notice their passions once again.  For some marriages, it is impossible for a couple to pursue both persons passions.  For some, each spouse does not see eye to eye with the dreams and passions, and thus, either the dream or the marriage is squashed….. sometimes both.

     From my perspective and experience in both my marriage, and the relationships which existed before my marriage, true happiness (aside from belief in God), comes from 2 spouses sharing dreams and passions.

     I believe that God intended for a marriage to come together, and for each spouse to BECOME ONE in everything - included passions.  I think God intended for spouses to walk through life fulfilling each other’s dreams, building each other up, encouraging each other to do whatever it is they need to do, (as long as it does not hinder their marriage or relationship with God).

     Jeremy and I have many friends who have entered into marriages already, and I pray that they can follow through in their marriages in this way.  But, we also have friends who have not married yet, but long to.  For them I pray that they would first strengthen their relationship with God, and find what the calling is for their lives.  I think it is only then that we are healthy enough to be able to enter into a marriage relationship.  I believe that if this step is skipped, the end result will be broken marriages, hearts, and/or dreams.

the Focus on the Future

Jeremy and I in Cambodia…. Jeremy and I living with 250 children…  Jeremy and I with no “real responsibility”, just floating along in life. 

     I am sure that is what some people think when they think of Jeremy and I.  Without being here with us, it is impossible to even imagine what our days look like.  WIthout experiencing it, it is impossible to feel what we feel, to experience what we experience.

     To be honest, it was easy to leave Canada on our year long adventure last year, seeking out where God would call us to be used.  We definitely had a lot of fun traveling, and not all of it was serving for sure, but I think that God used that time to build our marriage, and strengthen us for a potentially challenging (or not Canadian molded) future.

     Now, Jeremy and I stand here, in Cambodia, and look to God for direction once again.  It is amazing how hard decisions can be when all you want to do is be in the will of God, and not make selfish decisions.  

     We feel like God is telling not to focus on our Canadian careers, and the possibility of losing them.  We feel like He is telling us not to focus on our house, our possessions.  I know for a fact, that to leave these things, some people will think we are crazy.  

     We ask that all our friends and family would partner with us in prayer as we make decisions that have an impact on our future, but not only ours - our families and friends futures as well.

So what now...?

Alright, alright it's a loaded question and in some ways probably premature, right?  Is it really though?  The time here has been more encouraging than eye-opening I could say.  Our eyes have been opened before, that's why we're here now.  The encouragement from our friends here, family and friends back home and the smiling kids who encourage you simply by giving ALL their time to you has made it very worthwhile.  Too worthwhile?  A life-changing, life-shaping worthwhile?  There's a lot going on in our thoughts.  This passage in Isaiah is profound for me right now and consequently has landed in my devotional at precisely the right time:

If you offer your food to the hungry
    and satisfy the needs of the afflicted,
then your light shall rise in the darkness
    and your gloom be like the noonday.
The Lord will guide you continually,
    and satisfy your needs in parched places,
    and make your bones strong;
and you shall be like a watered garden,
    like a spring of water,
    whose waters never fail (Isa. 58:10-11)

Truly, I hope that God can give us wild dreams beyond our comfort and scope of thinking and challenge us to then go and accomplish it, no matter what.  I can feel God's provision for us and it gives great hope for the future, especially when wondering about all the what-ifs that would love to steal my time.  At the same time, I don't wish to say too much or too little.  God is working in us every day, for now and for the future.  I'm pretty sure He's telling us to reference any queries we have to Isaiah 58 for today and that in itself will be enough to face tomorrow.

Looking at the Immediate Future

Five years happens pretty fast.  You can earn a couple degrees, work a lot of hours and see many places.  If you’re lucky, maybe you’ll even complete your 5 year plan, which definitely included some of these criteria for us.  We certainly have grown together in half a decade of marriage, as we completed our education, gained valuable work experience and managed to stay somewhat cultured along the way.  Now on to the next step...

As part of our early years of marriage, it was always a valuable goal to complete our education as a means to prepare us for the work world of course, but our bigger dream of participating in global missions.  God gave both of us a very clear leading in our educational goals as we met, married and mapped out our future.  A teacher and a nurse are coveted positions in other parts of the world and we’ve really enjoyed working these jobs in Canada during the early stages of our careers. 

Edmonton is where we reside and work, but for the immediate future our home will be elsewhere.  On August 18th, 2011 we will be traveling to Haiti where we will serve for 4 months.  During our time, I (Jeremy) will be teaching English to a range of ages and Stacey will be tracking all medical records for the hundreds of students who attend the 4 schools run by the organization Haiti Outreach Ministries (HOM).  These are our primary objectives but we will also be involved in teacher training, construction, community outreach and evangelism.  

After Christmas we will return home to eat Alberta beef and peanut butter all while enjoying a time of refreshment with friends and family.  Our journey will continue east this time, landing in Australia and making our way north through much of southeast Asia before arriving in Cambodia for another 4 months of intensive ministry at Place of Rescue.  This organization focuses on education and community as it provides relief and a home for destitute grandmothers and children with AIDS.  We will continue to work in educational and medical fields here.

The planning process for this second leg of our journey is still in the works, although Cambodia has been given the green light and will involve preparations even as we are in Haiti.  We desire to have a chunk of time to travel after Christmas but we will also be seeking smaller ministry opportunities in southeast Asia as we trek around.  Ultimately, we know that this down time will restore much of the energy we will expend and we will seek to strengthen our bond as a couple as God leads us during the time away from our longer periods with organizations. 

We have prepared our hearts for this year, knowing full well that this could disclose what is to come in our next 5 years, or even beyond.  To be able to extensively... travel and enjoy so much culture and creation appeals to our adventurous sides but our true passion lies ahead with the relationships we will form and the lasting impact that the words and actions of Jesus Christ will leave along the way.  We are extremely open to the possibility of a longer term somewhere and this series of intermediate-length opportunities to serve will really speak to our capacity to serve with clear minds and open hearts for an extended period of time.

ACOP and it’s Missions Director Jerry (and Brenda) Scheutz have been extremely supportive and encouraging during our seeking process.  We will be sent under the covering of this organization which has embraced our mission as couple and will help us in many tangible ways as we move around.  They will be kept up to date with all our activities and take care of paperwork back home.  They will handle any donations that are contributed to our mission, which can be done by check or credit card. 

The truth is that we are committed to this year no matter what the cost and have made preparations to do so as part our process of mapping this journey out.  Our desire is not to be in this alone and willing people have already asked where they can donate as one of their means of supporting us along the way.  The total cost of the ministry portion of our trip is projected at $9 000 - $11 000.  We will be classified as volunteers during all ministry times this year so thanks for your financial support if you choose to give this way.  

Truly, this mission would never be happening if not for the extreme grace and mercy of our Lord Jesus Christ.  So many people have poured into our lives as we’ve ministered and worked in Canada both as individuals and a couple and if not for the invitation to join short-term mission teams, supportive church groups and unite with people in prayer, we could have never dreamed that this would finally take place.  We are excited that this year could mean many more years of serving in global missions and we ask that you pray for open doors, obedience, safety and above all that we can be the hands and feet of Jesus everywhere we walk.  

Much love to you all, Jeremy and Stacey